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He’s Adultin’ (Saweetie Parody)

Jose has a new apartment, clean dishes and a made bed! He’s made huge growth over the last few months so this song is for him. Instead of Saweetie’s “Best Friend” it’s Young Jeffrey’s “He’s Adultin’!”


Full lyrics:
He’s my WORK FRIEND’, and our LOVE Runs Deep…
But his OLD Place, was a REAL Trash Heap…
Pizza BOXes, on the Floor for Weeks…
Had a WINdow VIEW-into-the Back Alley,

In the KITCHEN, There’s a Real. BAD. Smell
Only ONE Pan, on the WHOLE Damn Shelf…
And his Toilet, Never Flushed that Well…
Bought a Roomba, but-it-went-and Killed Itself…

Beep! Beep!, * * He Took an Uber to the Office(?)
Woulda Drove his car, but Forgot, where he Parked it.
… Walk around the BLOCK, with a FEELIN’! of GLOOM
As his Packages get STOLE from his OWN, MAIL-ROOM,
Got His UP—STAIRS, Neighbor goin’ PSYCHO…
When he Pop a BAGEL Bite!, in the MICRO…
Then a-WHILE he was Bakin’, Had a RealiZation
That he NEEDED a Changin’, from his Crappy Location.

So he GRABBED, all his THINGS, and “BOXED! THEM UP”
Got a 4-MAN TEAM, with a “Big Mack-Truck”
Did da Home Make:Over, like: “Move that Bus”.
Then he Checked that BILL saying WHAT THE ????)
He’s Adultin’, New Life for him’
Got some HOUSE PLANTS, Been Waterin’ them
Do the DISHES, Now his place so ZEN
Hangin ARTWORK, Paintings of Two SPACE MEN

He’s Adultin’, He a Big. Bach.-LOR
Used to BE-a Slob, but He aint.NO. More
Plan to COOK food, & that’s no gossip
Betty Crocker instead of makin’ Hot pockets
He’s A-DULT!in’… Keep it REAL Clean…
He Got that WET. JET. Flexing on the Hy-Giene…
Bought a NICE! Couch… With the BIG Screen…
Playin’ FORRRT-NITE, yelling at the PRE-TEENS…

Saving Up CASH… and NOT lookin’ BACK
His 401-K Looking Greener THAN KERMIT…

HOME!… BOY… Making a Change…
Make his OWN… BED… and barely COMPLAINS,
Doin’ LAUN….DREE… avoiding the STAINS
Sortin’ WHITES-from-the-DARKS, in the Non-Racist Way,
He’s Adultin’, He’s a REAL good Dude
Sudden INTEREST, in the Nightly News
Big Collection, of Plastic Bags Half-Used
And when-he GO OUT, wear his Sensible Shoes

He’s Adultin’, it’s about. dang. time.
Look-like new money, Learnin’ bout fine wine
Gets Excited… Bout his New AirFRYin….
In the Evening, Hoppin’ into bed By Nine (hey!)

(*)..ALL GROWN, his MaTURITY is SHOWin’
DONATE! all ya Abercrombie CLothing
HOME BREW His Own COFFEE in the MonNing…
..Back Pain, pop another I-buprofen

WORK FRIEND, goin HARD on Adultin’
Growin’ up, just like ELSA in Frozen…
NO FOOD, in the Friiiidge, Decomposing…
… Take all his TRASH, to the Chute, For Disposin’…

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